Thursday, June 26, 2008
Sunday, June 22, 2008
baby shower pictures
Thursday, June 19, 2008
1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as
your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.
3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes.
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Preparing for the Birth:
1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.
2nd baby: You don't bother because you remember that last
time, breathing didn't do a thing.
3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your eighth month.
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The Layette:
1st baby: You pre-wash newborn's clothes, color-coordinate them,
and fold them neatly in the baby's little bureau.
2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and
discard only the ones with the darkest stains.
3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can't they?
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Worries:
1st baby: At the first sign of distress--a whimper,
a frown--you pick up the baby
2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten
to wake your firstborn.
3rd baby: You teach your three-year-old how to
rewind the mechanical swing.
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Pacifier:
1stbaby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until
you can go home and wash and boil it.
2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it
off with some juice from the baby's bottle.
3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.
______________________________________________________>Diapering:
1st baby: You change your baby's diapers every hour,
whether they need it or not.
2nd baby: You change their diaper every two to three hours, if needed.
3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to
complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.
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Activities
1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing,
Baby Zoo, Baby Movies and Baby Story Hour.
2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.
3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaners.
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Going Out:
1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter,
you call home five times.
2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to
leave a number where you can be reached.
3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees
blood.
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At Home:
1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.
2nd baby: You spend a bit of everyday watching to be sure your older child
isn't squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.
3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children
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Swallowing Coins (a favorite):
1st child: When first child swallows a coin, you rush the child to the
hospital and demand x-rays
2nd child: When second child swallows a coin, you carefully watch for the
coin to pass.
3rd child: When third child swallows a coin you deduct it from his
allowance!
Sunday, June 8, 2008
There once was a young woman who lived in her Choos,
Though she once had a house in a smart Chelsea Mews
So much on Jimmy,
The House had to go,
And with it, the Amex and Husband in tow!
-by Amy Allen
"This Little Piggy went to Prada"
Friday, June 6, 2008
First Name:
Paige
Last Name:
Foster
Gender:
Girl
PAIGE, could you please set the table?
I am not joking around PAIGE, this is really important to me!
PAIGE--PAIGE! Are you listening to me!?!
Hello, Wellington Inc. this is PAIGE.
PAIGE FOSTER, come on down! You're the next contestant!
Hey PAIGE. How are you doing?
Allow me to introduce myself. My name is PAIGE FOSTER.
PAIGE! Pick up your toys. I am not going to ask you again.
I am at PAIGE FOSTER's house.
Do you PAIGE FOSTER take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?
I talked to PAIGE this afternoon.
I am sorry, PAIGE isn't here right now. Can I take a message?
You'll have to see PAIGE FOSTER about that. She will know what to do.
Yes? PAIGE? Do you have a question?
Mr. FOSTER, if PAIGE would consistently turn her homework in--on time--she would be one of my star pupils.
Would passenger PAIGE FOSTER please see the nearest ticket agent?
PAIGE. Is that you?
And the winner is... PAIGE FOSTER!
Mommy! PAIGE ate my cookie!
Hello, you've reached the voice mail of PAIGE FOSTER. I am away from my desk right now. Please leave a message and I will return your call as soon as possible.
PAIGE, it's not the end of the world. It's just a car. You are more important than a car.
PAIGE, I love you!
Write back soon. Your Friend, PAIGE
Does PAIGE like avocado?
PAIGE, it's time for dinner.
PAIGE, FOSTER. Spelled P-A-I-G-E.
Oh, there you are PAIGE. I've been looking all over for you!
Still like PAIGE? Get it embroiderd on a bib, burp cloth, onesie, or diaper bag!
Some quotes to help me mentally prepare for labor, I am starting to get scared after the doc just told me Paige is probably going to be 9 lbs at birth.
"We are made to do this work and its not easy...I would say that pain is part of the glory, or the tremendous mystery of life. And that if anything, it's a kind of privilege to stand so close to such an incredible miracle." --Simone in Klasson 2001
"Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers ~ strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength." --Barbara Katz Rothman
"Anything I’ve ever done that ultimately was worthwhile…initially scared me to death." -Betty Bender
"We have a secret in our culture, and it's not that birth is painful. It's that women are strong." --Laura Stavoe Harm
"There is power that comes to women when they give birth. They don't ask for it, it simply invades them. Accumulates like clouds on the horizon and passes through, carrying the child with it." --Sheryl Feldman